A weekend in Rome

Rome, Italy
February 15-17, 2008

Chinese adoptees coming together - News Article

Chinese Adoptees Coming Together
By Jeff Gammage, Philadelphia Inquirer Staff Writer

For years, as American parents toted their adopted Chinese daughters to dragon fairs and New Year's banquets, they wondered: Will these girls eventually try to band together on their own? And if so, when?

The answers: yes, and now.

For the last few months, a 29-year-old Southern California adoptee named Jennifer Jue-Steuck has traveled the world, forging connections to create the first organization run by and for Chinese adoptees, nearly 62,000 of whom have come to the United States over the last 15 years.

Formation of Chinese Adoptee Links International (CAL) represents a new chapter in an unfolding saga and comes at a turbulent time, as China implements stricter rules that seem sure to limit foreign adoptions.

"We're on a different journey than our parents are on," said Jue-Steuck, who will make a promotional stop in Philadelphia on June 3 and in Doylestown on June 5. "There are some things that would be meaningful for us to have conversations among ourselves."

For instance, if you're born Chinese and raised in a white family, do you see beauty in faces that look like yours, or your parents'? How do you handle racism? How do you live comfortably in a society in which some people, maybe even in your extended family, will forever see you as a foreigner?

CAL - whose board of directors includes Amanda Baden, a noted adoption researcher at Montclair State University in New Jersey - was formed to find answers, to foster sisterhood, mentorship and, eventually, advocacy. The group sponsors a newsletter, a Web site and social events, for now limited to California. CAL doesn't yet offer adoptees a way to meet online.

Haddonfield mother Carter Lee envisions a day when her girls, Emilee, 8, and Tao, 4, could feel the need to join a group like CAL.

"For kids to have a network or a Web site or a group - for them, by them - is empowering," Lee said.

Lia Luciano, 17, an adoptee from Kunming who lives in Saddle Brook, N.J., has signed up for CAL's pen-pal program, which connects girls here with counterparts in Europe.

"It's very interesting learning about their life background and how they ended up in the orphanage or foster care," Luciano said.

In China, coercive government birth quotas and a societal preference for sons result in the routine abandonment of baby girls, thousands of whom land in state-run orphanages. Last year China sent 6,493 children to this country, the seventh consecutive year it led the world in adoptions to the United States.

Of course, as this cohort of girls and young women make their way through life, not all see a Chinese sisterhood as crucial.

"I'd like to have connections with other adoptees, as it might give us something in common, but I don't feel that it would guarantee a strong friendship," said McKenzie Forbes, 18, concluding her freshman year at Dickinson College in Carlisle.

"I'm not saying that we, as Chinese adoptees, should completely throw away or forget who we are," she said. "But it would actually be beneficial to treat us as simply Americans."

Many mothers and fathers connect their adoptive daughters to other girls and similar families, mainly through the support organization Families With Children From China (FCC). More than 450 families belong to chapters in the Philadelphia and South Jersey areas.

"Once these girls enter college, they're going to find themselves removed from the familiar network of local adoptees," said Phyllis Nellis, who with her husband, Amasa, is raising two daughters in Media. "I like the idea that there could potentially be a network in place for them."

"So far, what's on the site is for older adoptees," said Jeanne Brody, who with her husband, William Foley, is raising Caroline, 12, and Juliette, 9, in Wallingford.

Preteens are more interested in music and boys than in adoption issues, noted Brody, who runs the "As They Grow" committee of the Delaware Valley FCC. But as they age, and confront issues such as China's treatment of women, they may well take part in CAL, she said.

Kids who have arrived since the 1990s joined a small number of older adoptees - such as Jue-Steuck - who came before the mainland opened, often from such places as Hong Kong and Taiwan. Because newer emigres usually arrive as babies or toddlers, their histories are learned from their parents: Here's where you lived in China. Here's how you came here.

Many foresee a time when the girls will essentially tell their parents, I'll take it from here.

"I think CAL has a future connecting kids," said board member Peggy Scott, who grew up in Jenkintown and is president of the Northern California FCC, with 690 member families.

The idea for CAL came in late 2006, after Jue-Steuck traveled to France, Spain and Ireland to conduct research for her doctorate at the University of California-Berkeley. She was struck by the number of Chinese adoptees she met.

"They were very curious about the Chinese girls in the U.S.," she said. "I thought, 'How could we get you two hooked up?' "

A pen-pal program expanded into a Web presence and, from there, to dances and movie nights. In March, Jue-Steuck visited England, Ireland and Belgium to meet adoptees. She'll soon tour U.S. cities.

While the kids here have a much larger peer group, and thus greater chance to interact, Jue-Steuck said, the girls' questions haven't varied much from country to country.

"They just like to know they've met someone who is older, who has been there," she said.

CAL is run by volunteers on three continents. Membership is free.

Jue-Steuck, who arrived from Taiwan at age 2, hopes CAL will be a true pan-Asian adoptee movement, since many girls have siblings from Vietnam or Korea. She also wants it to be an advocate for changing laws such as China's one-child policy.

"There are thousands upon thousands of young Chinese adoptees who are spread out across the world," said CAL board member Mei-Mei Ellerman, a scholar at Brandeis University, adopted in 1943.

"It's really, really important that these young people have each other."

Just because I could - The Five Factor Personality Test

Interestinly, I think this silly little quiz described me fairly well.

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have medium extroversion. You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party. Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences. But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have medium conscientiousness. You're generally good at balancing work and play. When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done. But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it. Agreeableness: You have medium agreeableness. You're generally a friendly and trusting person. But you also have a healthy dose of cynicism. You get along well with others, as long as they play fair. Neuroticism: You have medium neuroticism. You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic. Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy. Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is medium. You are generally broad minded when it come to new things. But if something crosses a moral line, there's no way you'll approve of it. You are suspicious of anything too wacky, though you do still consider creativity a virtue.

The Five Factor Personality Test

Hello Moon!

So I've been on a posting frenzy today. But this is one I just had to get down so I wouldn't forget it.

Wren has always loved the moon. In fact, it was one of the first words she said. It was one night around early December 2006 when we driving home from somewhere and Wren looked out the car window and proceeded to say moon, moon, moon over and over again.

So today we were walking to the supermarket in Milan and Wren points the moon out to me. (She does this most any time the moon is visible.)

Only today she started talking to the moon. She said, "Hello, Moon!" and then proceeded to tell it we were going to the store. She did this for a few minutes before she told the moon goodbye and we proceeded on down Corso Garibaldi.

Is it real?

It seems I have a lot of time on my hands these days. Hopefully that will be coming to an end once we return home, but for now, it has given me time to surf the internet and blog hop and read a few things that are out there on the web.

One of the things I've been reading about is the differing opinions on whether global warming is a cause for alarm or even if it is real. Jason and I fall into the group that believes it is real and I happen to find it very alarming. But I can see where others might not believe it. It is hard to find accurate information about what is really happening and whether there really is a reason to be worried about it.

But a very good point was made to me the other day. We don't know for sure if any of the dire predictions about the effects of global warming will actually come true. But what is the harm in doing the things that might make a positive impact on helping to alleviate global warming. It seems if global warming is indeed true then at best we help save the planet for our children and if global warming in false then we leave the world a better and healthier place.

Thoughts on adoption

In the late 80's, when I was in high school, I watched a TV program about Romanian orphans. That was when I knew I wanted to adopt a child internationally. So now, almost 20 years later, Jason and I accomplished my dream with the addition of Wren to our family. I know we all fit each other perfectly and I feel that she is right where she belongs, but every so often I worry if we did the right thing. Occasionally I read articles about Chinese families trying to adopt and being turned away and told there are no available babies. Is this true? Are all the eligible babies being adopted internationally? I don't know. But every so often a flicker of doubt crosses my mind - if Wren could have been adopted by a well-off Chinese family, would this have been better?



And, a little of the topic of my post but still about adoption. A friend of mine shared this news story with me that talks about international and specifically Chinese adoptions.
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2008/02/13/MNQFUSKQQ.DTL

Milan Carnevale

While Jason was in Rome with his friend Ted, Wren and I walked down to Piazza del Duomo to see what was going on in Milan for Carnevale weekend.


Piazza del Duomo


Kids playing with confetti and air vents


Wren was more interested in her doughnut.


...Waaaay more interested!


This is just a random shot from a playground in Milan.

Happy Chinese New Year!

Happy Chinese New Year and Xin Nian Kuai Le in this year of the rat!

Here are some pictures of Wren in her Chinese New Year outfit.
We were on the train going from Milan to Varese to attend a meeting.
As we were not able to find out about any celebrations in the Milan area,
we didn't do much for CNY this year.
But we hope to participate next year in the festivities in Huntsville

with the Families with Children from China group.

Ivrea Orange Battle

Questi tre amici hanno divertiti un sacco alla Battaglia Arancione di Ivrea.
These three friends had a lot of fun at the Ivrea Orange Battle.
Jason (left), Chad (middle), Ted (right)

Sunday, 3 February 2008

Wren and Lee Anne didn't go on this day trip because we had been last year and we thought we might hold the guys up. So Jason, Ted and Chad (from work) went to actually participate in the Ivrea Orange Battle this year. For more information on this interesting carnevale celebration, please see our post from last year at http://wren05.blogspot.com/2007/02/carnevale-in-ivrea.html


Coming into the town of Ivrea


The main piazza


Ted (left) and Chad (right) are ready to throw some oranges.


People wear red hats to show that they aren't participating in the battle.


Battle wagon sign


These two pretty Italian girls are ready for the fight.


Loading up with oranges for the battle.


Here comes a wagon!


Action shot


Inside one of the wagons


What's left of just some of the oranges.


After the battle - look at all that orange pulp!

Carnevale in Venice

Saturday, 2 February 2008

All of us, including Ted, too the train from Milan and spent the day in Venice. The reason why we went was so we could see the Carnevale celebreations. It was certainly worth it and was quite a spectacle to behold. I hope you enjoy our pictures!


On our way to Piazza San Marco via the vaporetto (water taxi).


A couple in costume in front of the Basilica di San Marco


more costumes in Piazza San Marco


crowds on the Rialto Bridge


the canal looks calm compared to the crowds on the streets


more costumes


in fuchsia


this person was a chandelier


all in white


Ted


view without Ted


view at night


Wren after a long day


Finally at home and Wren decides to hang out with Ted.